Winners Give Up (Smooching)! or Winners Give Up Kissing A$$

I used to watch Looney Toones when I was a kid ( maverick, I know!) This one I remember, where there was a big alpha bulldog, with the spiked collar. I even think his name was Spike. Spike was always followed around by a little yapping dog. He was constantly yapping, sticking his nose in here and there, leaping up and down, running circles around Spike as he was trying to make his way down the road.
It was amazingly annoying to me, even at a tender young age. People who have ambitions or are trying to make their way up the ladder, sooner or later need to decide which type of dog they’re going to be.
You know the guy (or gal) who everyone is secretly (or not so secretly) annoyed by? You shake your heads at them behind their back. They could be your neighbor, or sit in the cubicle next to you. Regardless, the one who is CONSTANTLY kissing the bosses A**. Yap, yap, yapping. They draw so much time and attention to themselves its exhausting just to watch. Put yourself in the shoes of the boss, the big dog, do you think they really enjoy that, constantly being followed around by that yapping little dog? They may send it on errands, tasks etc. But at the end of the day, who are they going to want to promote or give the real meaty assignments to? The one who yaps all the time in search of attention? Or the one who gets attention for the work that speaks for itself?
Winners have learned to let their actions and works speak for themselves. They quietly organize the PTA meetings, they drive the projects and spread the credit around. They focus their energies on the end results. They draw attention to others and shine in the process. There is no need to kiss the bosses (Okole), no need to chase after the boss all day long, running back and forth across their path to constantly be seen, sooner or later the boss will come looking for you.

Give up short term gratification!

Take a look at the successful people you know or admire. How much time have you spent wondering what they did or what they have that you don’t? Successful people in business, in life and in relationships have learned that you sometimes have to give up your immediate wants and often have to forgo the easy, safe, decision to achieve a loftier goal. This takes patience, sacrifice and most importantly, an unfailing belief in what you are trying to accomplish. Don’t sell your true dreams short by settling for instant, and often mediocre results.

Winners give up Easy!

Don’t they? Have you ever looked at the income percentages of the U.S. population? If you make $100,000.00, you’re in the upper 4% of the population. Do 96% of us not aspire to, or dream about making good money? What If I told you about the upper 1%...Wow! What are these people doing that you’re NOT doing?

I ask myself, “How can these statistics possibly be true, when every day I have the opportunity to make millions online if I just pay $39.99?” I can turn $20,000.00 a month if I just subscribe to this “Marketing Expert’s” proven strategy and follow his simple system. This is perfect, I can sit at my computer and reshuffle Craigslist ads and make $1750.00 a day!! It’s easy….it’s soooo easy!!

Easy doesn’t work. The upper 4% gave up on easy a long time ago. Today, the divorce rate is securely over 50% for first marriages. It’s well above that for serial practitioners. Marriage isn’t easy. Divorce, that’s easy.

Successful people in life and in business continuously decide to take on things that are not easy. Want to stand out? Look around you and find the hard things that people are unwilling to do; things that people are complaining about doing, and decide to take those things on. It will take determination, and it will cause frustration. But once you choose to seek, and relish, the challenging opportunities, you’ll not only stand tall, but be rewarded in ways you can’t even imagine.

Winners Give Up Control!

…Or at least they give up worrying about the things they can’t control. As the economic climate has worsened, I’ve noticed more and more people acting like an animal backed up into a corner. They are vociferous in their anger, lashing out at the closest living thing. The economy of 2009 has changed people’s lifestyle. It’s changed mine for sure. I call it the O-pression (Obabma’s Depression).

For sure, the economy is the worst I’ve seen in my lifetime. Many people have never experienced a downturn and are ill prepared to handle financial frustrations. Of course we are confused by the bombardment of media mixed messaging. I digress.

This is my question to you: If you are unemployed, underemployed and financially struggling, why did you let it happen? Why did you force your company to lay you off? Why did you suggest ill timed constrictions on interest rates to the Fed Chair. way back when, why did you allow lending institutions to over extend, bundle and sell the unjustifiable mortgages that led to the bursting of the real estate bubble? Why, Why, Why?

Ridiculous right? You had no control over these events. You can’t single handedly control the course of the economy. So why worry about things BEYOND YOUR CONTROL? Worrying is like a rocking chair (or so I’ve heard). It takes a lot of energy, but goes nowhere.

What CAN you control? Winners have learned how to control their reactions, and focus their energy on the things they can change. Give up worry. Give up control and except that the only control you have, or NEED, is the control over how you react to adversity. So go ahead, come out of the corner swinging…just swing at something that counts.

Winners give up working!

What? Don’t winners work 24/7? Don’t they expend every last joule of energy on their current project with laser-like focus?

Winners should not be confused with those who work 24/7 like, for example, workaholics, or people with a lack of confidence in their own abilities, or those with a case of occupational OCD. “Avoiders” work constantly. They do so to escape personal and social connections, and responsibilities outside of “work”. These people avoid happiness and a full and balanced experience of life.

Successful people do work harder, and with more focus than most. They do the things others are unwilling to do. But they also have an off switch. Winners know how and when to shut it down. They have learned that it’s OK to relax and enjoy the fruits of their hard work, the people around them, and the solitude of their own company while dwelling in gratitude for their progress.

Take off for an hour perhaps two. Sit in the park, lounge in a bookstore, pick up your kid from school, bring takeout to your spouse…take a breath and reflect. If you can do this from time to time you’ll make exponential progress in your endeavors…I promise. If the thought of playing hooky for a couple of hours racks you with anxiety and feelings of guilt, then you should take the WHOLE day.

Winners Give up “Giving up”

The new year has crested over the dyke and we are awash with new possibilities. The truth is, we are awash with the possibility of change in our lives every moment of every day. The new year is a marker, acting as a catalyst for change. This is when we find ourselves mentally prepared to accept something better into our lives. We give ourselves permission to dream of alternatives; new goals, new skills, more income, more education, less of ourselves…smaller pant and dress sizes, etc!
I invite you, on this day of new beginnings, to focus on the one thing which has eluded, evaded or failed you. With laser-like intensity, use this opportunity to cause one massive change…to accomplish something which you had previously given up on. Take action, even if it seems insignificant. Winners know perseverance, they allow themselves to feel a burning, consuming desire for their goals and they don’t give up on them. It doesn’t matter what other people think of your goals. What matters is that you condition your mind to believe and achieve.
By sticking to one, meaningful, burning goal and crawling, clawing towards it, sometimes inch by inch…you WILL teach yourself to persevere. Soon you will be walking toward your goals, then jogging, and then running! Sooner than you can imagine, if you stay focused and don’t give up, you’ll stop running toward your goals…your goals will start running toward you.